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Spirit Tears

Some posts are hard to write because I know they're going to break my heart. This is one such post. But...when the Spirit nudges, you listen because it won't give up sometimes until I'm glued in front of my keyboard!

The past week has had me pondering several times about something I seldom think about: the sadness of God. I focus so much on the loving side of Him sometimes, that I forget that he MUST be affected by the workings of this world. In my own little bubble, here's how I know the Holy Spirit in me is sad. I cry. But rather than a face scrunching, ugly cry, tears simply stream from my eyes and I can't stop them even if I wanted to. I think they are a gift. A gift that breaks my heart, but a gift. Last weekend I had them. After watching the movie Coco, my lovely little man told me the point of the movie was bringing family together. And then, that poor soul started to cry and told me he missed his family. "I miss you and me and daddy together" were his words. And those Spirit tears started. (and to be honest, they're going again). Because I believe some things with all of my heart. I believe that my baby deserved to be raised in a home that had his mommy and daddy in it. Together. That's not the life he has. It's okay for him to be sad about that. Goodness, I'm still sad about that, not so much for me anymore, but for him! It also makes God sad. He designed marriage to be one way and we have managed to muck it up terribly down here, in more cases than not, unfortunately.

So yes, divorce makes God sad. BUT: He doesn't get stuck in the sadness because he loves us so stinking much. So I can't either.



I believe those wise words are from John Piper. I love them! :) I have trusted God to get me through; so I must also trust God to move me forward: not being stuck in what was "supposed" to be. I can grieve it, my son can grieve it, but we must move on. We must find the blessings that exist on the road that we're actually walking on, instead of the road "planned." The hard part is that I'm 35 and can process that on a different level than an almost 8 year old. :) It's hard to explain to and 8 year old what blessings look like. But just now I have decided this week in school we are going to make a list of blessings that we wouldn't be aware of if life had gone on as "normal." It will be a long list :)

Do you know what infinite love looks like? Sunday school answer: For God so loved the world that he sent his one and only son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. Love looks like a creator whose heart breaks for children feeling sad. Love looks like a God who loves us even when our choices make his Spirit cry. Love is a God who feels and thus gave us those same feelings. He loved, so we love. He loves us silly people who are wholly together, and broken, but pretty much since the creation of Man, there's been an awful lot of broken.

So what do we do? I think it would be pretty spectacular if we lived our lives in a way as to not make the Holy Spirit cry. :) Like right now, make a decision: "God, I don't want to break your heart. Please help me move forward in a Spirit of love that takes in account more of your will than the world's. Even when it's hard. Help me be different. Help me be love. Help me help people who are stuck get unstuck and trust You. Be my Guide."


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