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Joy

This is for you. You know who you are!

Here's my story, concisely and truthfully. 

If you asked me if I was a Christian my whole life I would have told you yes. I was Catholic. I knew who Jesus was. The end. 

But then I realized that being Catholic doesn't HAVE to mean you are a Christian. It just means you are Catholic. You have to have a relationship with Jesus Christ to be a Christian...and I was missing that piece. And I was aching for it...I just didn't know it. 

When I was 25 I became a Christian. I loved the Lord. But my faith was somehow tied to the man who led me to it (the father of my son). 

I grew as a Christian during my married life, yes....but I still somehow had a God-shaped hole in my life. I tried to fit my husband in that spot...but he didn't fit. So, after he left my life (in the role of husband anyway), I had ANOTHER hole. Bigger than before. Something had to fill it.

I didn't really think that it needed to be Jesus, because he had already entered my life...right? But that is exactly what needed to fill that hole. Jesus Christ. He was my rock at the bottom. He was the friend I longed for. He was the repentance I needed to give. He was the love that I didn't know I was missing. He was the grace that was waiting.

After reading the Bible because I needed those words to get through day; I discovered something I really already knew. People will let you down. People will hurt you and disappoint you. People will leave you with holes. Even when they unintentionally create them. People are not perfect -they actually CANNOT be. God, on the other hand, has never let me down. Never. His promises are true. He cannot lie. He IS love. Going through life believing these things is not easy. There is no magic button you can hit once you believe God is who He says He is and Jesus becomes front and center.  Life is not suddenly perfect. Happiness does not abound. 

But there is something better than happiness. Happiness does NOT necessarily bring you Joy. Joy needs a capital J. Joy does not depend on any people, OR any circumstances. Joy is a heart status. Joy comes when you do your best to be the child-of-God self you were created to be. Joy comes when you believe God. Joy comes when you realize you have no holes in your heart because where there was a God shaped one; He filled it so full that not only can He not fall out - there isn't room for anything else. Joy comes every day - as a choice. And some days that is a REALLY hard choice to make and you are going to want to go to back to seeking happiness because it's there and tangible and can be measured to some extent. 

To you: I will let you down. I will hurt you even though that is not my intent. I will drive you crazy. But I will also love you. And I pray that God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit fill up any holes that live in your heart. Life is waiting for you. Love like you never knew is waiting for you too! :) 

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