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Be Thou My Vision

Ash Wednesday. This year on Valentine's Day, last year on March 1st, which happened to be my wedding anniversary. Both years it has fallen on a day that part of me was dreading and I'm so grateful :) 
This year's message hit me even before service started. As I glanced through the program my heart dropped when I saw that Be Thou My Vision was on the play list. That song, in two pretty key moments of my marriage, signified meanings of "home." Once in regard to a home church and one solidifying that Nathan Sr was where I belonged. That he was my home...and that obviously hasn't worked out very well! So the song is hard for me to listen to. Until today.

God has shown me many times over the last months that the things that are hardest for me to do are hard because my emotions are tied to the wrong things! Be Thou My Vision isn't about Nathan. At all! The lyrics show such desire for God to be our vision, our wisdom, our true word, our heart...that is what my focus should be on; not who I was with when I first sang them. 

The same thing happened recently with a Bible. I received one shortly after I met Nathan and it lasted my marriage. Then I promptly got a new one because I didn't want to see what I had highlighted and written during some key moments. Can you get where I'm going with this: the Bible is the Word of God. That should be my focus when I read it. What was highlighted or prayed for matters; but what matters most is the words on the page. And gosh darn, it, I LOVE that study bible. So, I'm back in it. :)

If I'm right, I'm not alone in being ruled by my emotions at times. Emotions are real. They are strong. I am NOT downplaying them. I'm just trying to get you to realize that they are not the be-all, and end-all. What you felt when something happened to you should not overshadow the Creator who was there for it all. If our focus is always on the emotional ties and avoiding the hard things, we miss lots of lessons and I'm starting to understand, we also miss lots of blessings. 

This whole song fills me up to the brim and as my words have run out I'm leaving you with this: 

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light
Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one
Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art
High King of Heaven, my victory won
May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heav’n’s Sun
Heart of my own heart, whate’er befall
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all
My prayer is that you ponder those words. Soak them in. Find God as your vision and your true Word. Let him invade those memories you have that are hard so your focus can change and you can let go. And really, let God!





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